I Won't Take Nothing but a Memory, From the House That Built Me

At first glance, it may appear that Vern's Volvo is the assortment of parts lying in a heap in the back of Grace's automobile shop. The parts did originally come from Vern's Volvo, and together would make up the remnants of Vern's old car. However, after contemplating the ownership of Vern's vehicle, my mind wandered to a popular country song by Miranda Lampert. It was playing on my Pandora country station as I reread the blog question to myself. I realized quickly that the song, "House that Built Me" was surprisingly relevant to the topic of ownership. Vern's Volvo is similar to Miranda Lampert's old house, and also my own previous home.
     I recently drove past my old house, and realized that the new owners of the house changed the color of MY vibrant red door to a plain black color. They also changed the color of the roof, and the design on the siding. I was angry and even upset that the new homeowners would have the nerve to change MY red door, MY siding, and MY roof. It wasn't until the discussion of ownership in class that I realized I had no reason to angry anymore. Although it is upsetting to admit, my old house is no longer my home. My home is where I live, eat, study, cry, laugh, and (occasionally) sleep. However, this label will obviously change as my life continues and will be altered based on my location and internal mindset. I still hold an emotional attachment to my previous home, but my relationship to my old house has changed. The house on Indian River road, went from "is my home" to "was my home". The change of verb tenses is the key to both those phrases and holds the distinction of past and present. My old house now exists in my memory in the same manner as it did while I was growing up. I still remember opening that red door everyday for 10 years, but now the red door's purpose has changed. The same object, now painted black, will hold a different set of memories for an entirely different child. Not only has my red door helped answer the question about Vern's Volvo,  it also has provided me some closure to the sadness I felt when seeing my old home for the first time since I lived there.
     Vern's Volvo is very similar to my red door. Although the parts in Grace's garage previously belonged to Vern, their purpose has changed. Vern traded parts of his car for new parts to ensure that his car remained functional. Vern might have some nostalgia for the cracked rear view mirror that Vern hit while teaching his first born son to drive, however, the cracked mirror serves only a purpose when paired with a memory. Without the memory to go along with the part, the cracked mirror is only a piece of glass attached to plastic. Vern's car remains the one that he is driving because although the old parts may hold his memories, they will never again create the same meaning that they once had while Vern drove the car. Vern's current automobile is not only a specific object, it is also is the label that he places on his new Volvo. It "is" his car. His car is not the one lying in pieces in the back on Grace's shop. Those pieces "were" Vern's car, but the ownership of Vern's car remains in the car that serves Vern at the present moment. The emotional attachments to the pieces of his old car remain strong, however the actual parts to his Volvo are no longer his. If Grace decides to remake the car using Vern's old parts then the parts will have a new purpose, and will be looked at entirely differently by the person who drives the reassembled car. The fixed mirror will no longer hold the memory of Vern's son breaking it. The new driver will associate new memories to the same piece of glass and plastic. When deciding the ownership of Vern's vehicle it is important to separate the memories associated the parts of Vern's old car and the actual parts of Vern's old car. The memories will always remain his, however the actual parts of the car are no longer in his possession. The beauty of tangible objects is that one item can represent thousands of things, and can hold meaning that is different for each individual. One reason why humans tend to love tangible objects is not merely because of the actual existence of the object- I do not love all red doors. My attachment remains tied to the memory of my childhood and not to the small tangible part of my house. The door of the house is no longer mine. In the same fashion, the pieces of Vern's Volvo are no longer his, but the memory of what occurred in Vern's old car will remain. The car that is rightfully Vern's is the one that he drives around currently, not the pile of parts in the back of Graces garage.

“Society exists only as a mental concept; in the real world there are only individuals.” -Oscar Wilde

     The struggle of adhering to either the individual or society is one that has been debated for centuries. As the cultures of America shift through the decades, the balance between individual and society is altered, creating a shift in the importance of the two. For example, during John Winthrop's era, the society was regarded in a high fashion and the individual was held to little importance. Society is obliged to the individual because after all society consists of groups of individuals. Without the individual, society would be quite boring and new ideas would not be created. Part of the genius behind a full fledged society is the fact that it it comprised of individuals working to better the world they live in. The most successful societies have rules that are in tact but also have individuals who are willing to contribute positively to society and take just as much as they put in. When this occurs, society can ultimately give back to the individual because there is a balance. This is seen in paved roads, a set currency and public schools. Society can provide a positive place to grown up and become successful in life but it gives no freebies. In the same manner, society can also set up an individual to fail. Based in societal implications and racism, certain types of people were set up to fail throughout American history, especially African Americans. even after obtaining suffrage, there were poll tests to "weed out" those who were not deemed intelligent enough to vote. However, most often it discriminated against the poorly educated newly freed African Americans. Society is obliged to respond to the individual because that is what shapes it. Depending on the individuals partaking in a certain society, the manners in which people behave and the way people dress can be a direct link to society and its ability to shift and change almost on a day to day basis. In this case, directly violating laws and going against society is an okay thing to do because there is a flaw in society, and individuals must take it upon themselves and change it for the better, or the worse. Either way, a change must be made and it is up to the individual to make that change.
     People are also obliged to uphold the laws of society. The United States Government gives the American people many added benefits that societies all over the world only dream of. It is only fair to uphold the rules of society in order to receive these extra perks of living in a democratic nation.   By accepting these "gifts" such as paved roads and public schools, we are agreeing to oblige to society and not create an uncivilized uproar. This is not to say we should not have the power to have our voice heard, and that is exactly the idea behind a perfect democratic society. In the most basic terms, the only way that the individual should defy society is when one feels that there is injustice occurring, such as the Civil Rights movement or the womens suffrage movement. The role of the individual is necessary to society in the same way that society is necessary to the individual. Th individual ultimately shapes society and can be one of the only predictions of our future.

“I do not think much of a man who is not wiser today than he was yesterday." Abraham Lincoln

     To know thyself may be the hardest task to complete in ones life. The best (and quite possibly the worst) thing about a human being is the fact that we are malleable. We bend, and we change and we are morphed into who we are at the present. We gain new experiences that shape our understandings of the world and challenge our opinions. One cannot ever be satisfied with knowing thyself because we are so often changed by the world around us. There is so much extra stimuli; whether it be through the media, through college flyers or through school, we are bombarded with reasons to be different. To know thyself is not only to understand the inner workings of ones mind, but to also be able recognize the changes that are taking place within thyself. This self- knowledge can be extremely important in the short term because understanding ones inner feelings and conflicts can lead to self therapy and a soothing period. Also, the knowledge of thyself can contribute to know knowledge of where one comes from, and ones past. By recognizing the changes being made throughout ones life. 
     One of my major weaknesses stems from a lack of confidence both socially and especially academically. Through this, I take everyones advice on how to make me a better person, and I strive for approval. This can be a huge detriment because I set unrealistic goals for myself and often set myself up for failure. I often do not feel good enough about myself and settle for less than I should. I give up easily and this revolves back to my extreme lack of confidence. There will always be someone better than I, and I will not always become friends with every person I meet. However, this is my goal. I need approval from my peers, my parents, and my teachers. When I do not meet standards or expectations I become furious with myself and often look to change various parts of who I am to fit in with a specific group. I allow people to put a tremendous amount of pressure on my shoulders, and allow people to decide exactly who and what I should be. Even so, I will do almost anything in my power to gain ones approval, especially academically. However sometimes, things are not in my power, and I cannot change someones opinion of me. When this happens I become devastated, and try my hardest not to accept it. That feeling of rejection sets me up to be the biggest failure. Ultimately my flaw is not that I attempt to win the approval of others, its the mere fact that I cannot be perfect, and I cannot win the approval of others. As I reread this paragraph, it sounds ridiculous, petty and is pretty embarrassing. It seems poorly written, and jumbled. But imperfection is my flaw, and it is speaks volumes. I guess it's easier to write about a flaw in a blog then discuss it with those who it affects most.
     Truthfully, I haven't done much to change this particular flaw. Peoples opinions matter to me, and they always will. Its not the best feeling in the world, but I don't have the mindset to change it currently. Hopefully, eventually, I learn to be who I am and not listen to anyone who tells me otherwise. 
     On a lighter note, my best character trait comes from my emotional intelligence. One of my greatest strengths is the ability to connect with other people. I have always been a social girl, but on a deeper level, I am able to understand human emotions at a subconscious level. I can connect so strongly to people that I often can allow myself to experience what it is they're going through both mentally and emotionally. Because of this, I have a strong sense of empathy towards other people. This connects back to my greatest flaw because while my ability to understand emotions can often be profound, I also tend to strap on emotions that other people are feeling. For example, College. I am not truly stressed about getting into a college, because I know I will get in somewhere and make the best of my situation. However, when I see my peers becoming stressed, I often link on to that emotion and actually feel stressed.  I love to connect with people, and understand their emotions. I am often the anchor for my friends. They tell me all of their problems, their worries and their fears and I bottle them up and exhibit a strong sense of empathy. Sometimes, after a long talk with one of my best friends, I go home and cry to my mom about a topic that is too upsetting talk about.I am often the giver and do not ask for much in return, even when I am emotionally exhausted. However, I do not see this as a flaw. I believe this is a huge strength, and I do not mind feeling beaten down sometimes because others around me tend to gain strength.
     One thing that is so hard about writing down our own flaws is that it forces us to admit that we as human beings are not perfect. We are not even close. The pressures in society to be perfect are overwhelming and when we are forced to explain the worst part of our character, it startles us. We choose to believe that we have nothing wrong with  human beings, and that nothing can be changed to make us better. We look down on those who deal with their flaws in the open; instead of acting as a Stepford wife. Another reason flaws are so hard to write down is because of the fear of judgement. Being judged on our strong points is one thing, but comparing and contrasting our flaws with others can be unnerving. 
     I felt as though this was a necessary and humbling exercise. I would be lying if I said I didn't shed a few tears as I struggled through this blog, but by the end it turned out to be emotionally cleansing. Acknowledging  our strengths and weaknesses is the first step in combating them. Many people in this world do not ever reach this step in their lifetime.

To Be Good, Or Not To Be Good, That Is The Question.

      The "good" in the world should not be rewarded. I do not agree that a good action justifies a good ending. Sometimes, doing the right and morally correct thing does not constitute a reward and does not always work out in the do-gooders favor. If good people were constantly being rewarded i do not believe they would remain good for very long. It is human nature to adapt and develop a routine with rewards and such. After a period of time, people would rely on the reward and no longer do good things for the sole purpose of being good. It would be a vicious cycle which demoralizes the act of being righteous or morally correct. The idea of morality is also an important factor in handing out rewards for doing good. Hitler believed that he was doing good by exterminating 6 million Jews, does he earn a reward? It comes down to the basic definition of the word good. I do not believe that there is a universal definition for this broad generalizing word. For example, (in bad grammar) chocolate may be "good" for some people, but for others, vanilla is "good". Which act constitutes a reward, eating chocolate or vanilla? Because the word good is so hard to define, it makes it quite impossible to reward human beings for being good or doing the correct thing.
     It is quite easy for me to say that the evil should be punished. They do a bad thing, and we as humans, want justice. We don't like to see the bad guy get away with bad deeds. We hope desperately that karma will come around and knock them off of their pedestal. Unfortunately the hard truth is that often, bad goes unpunished. Should someone be punished for killing a person? The answer is yes. For every situation where a person is killed, the answer is no.  Regardless of whether evil is punished or not, it is our job in society to not lose sight of the good within each of us. One by one we can extinguish the evil within ourselves and strengthen the good. If each person focuses on solving their own issues, I truly believe that slowly the world would become a better place. Our society thrives on bonuses and rewards but there is also a side of humanity that does good things not for the rewards or prizes, but for the bettering of society, and the world around us. 
     It may seem unfair when the bad people in this world  never lose. It's hard to stay "good" when their seems to be so many initial benefits of doing the wrong thing. But I have faith in our humanity, and  I know how strong the human soul truly is.  To be honest, I haven't quite figured out why people stay good when so many of the evil people thrive in today's society. All I know is people do it. Maybe its because people believe in a higher power, or maybe its because of the soul of steel that lies within each human. Either way, people choose the right path because they know it is the right thing to do.
     God punishes Job to prove that Job is strong enough to handle anything that God throws at him. God wants to show the devil that Job will pray to God in times of terrible misfortune and not only during good times. Job was an avid follower of God during his life. Job also had everything he could have ever wanted. He had a wife, children, his health and crops galore. God wanted to prove to the devil that Job would pray to him even when all this was taken away. Regardless of what Job had, he would still believe in God and trust that everything was happening for a reason; even if it wasn't an apparent one

We know that life has value based on the contributions that we have made to world around us. I think that it starts at home and in our surroundings, but also can extend to encompass the world. Although personal accomplishments are an important part of succeeding in life, I do not think that they neccesarily give life meaning.  It is a hard concept to unravel; thinking about whether my own life has meaning and it is an even scarier thought to wonder if my life will have meaning as I travel through life.  However, I think that one of the most improtant factors in making sure I have a meaningful life is taking the time to appreciate what I have right now. Most times, we become so involved in acheiving, and reaching the next level that we forget to look around once in awhile and appreciate the things and people we have in our lives now. To make life worthwhile, it is impirtant to remeber and act on the most basic human feelings such as happiness, humility and accpetance. Someone who is not happy but has a highpaying job and a great house does not constitute a meaningful life. However, one who is happy with less and shares with others can be seen to have a meaningful life. I think that the choice to go down the path towards acheiving meaning is not neccesarily a concious decision.  Many times, we continue down a path because it feels right to us, depending on our moral compass at the time. Sometimes that can lead to a negative path and other times it can lead to a more positive one.  However, there are always pathways between the two roads where any human being and cross between. A person who acheives meaning in the end is not always the person who stayed on the right path for their entire life. In fact, that is rarely possible at all.
      5 things that i want to posses or experience by the end of my life are as follows:
1. Travel to a foreign country to help for longer than a week
2. work for a humanitarian organization/ something in international relations
3. Have a family, husband
4. Make sure kids have solid moral values
5.possess closure that I lived my life to the fullest extent

     After going to Nicargua my sophomore year, I want to go on more service missions for longer periods of time so that I can feel that i made a significant change somewhere in the world. Because I was able to see people who were much less fortunate than I was, I understand how important it is to leave my comfort zone and see other parts of the world. I would like to continue this as I travel through life. It is one way that I believe that I will make my life worthwhile. All 5 of my ultimate goals reflect a portion of humanity, and in a sense, keeping humanity alive and strong. I hope to have a family and to be able to teach them the moral values that I believe, and be able to give them skills that they need to make their own choices. This reflects the concept of humanity because if humans do not have moral values in the future than humanity cannot exist.

I'll be leaving my mark like initials carved into an old oak tree

Impermanence is an interesting idea for humankind. Most people continuously search for a way to truly achieve immortality whether it be literal or figurative. Utapishtim makes the connection between mortality and human kind and says to Gilgamesh that "there is no permanence", suggesting that immortality cannot ever be obtained. However, although physically immortality may not be possible, humans have found ways to remain a part of society for generations after their physical death. One way in which humans have achieved immortality is through the act of writing. By writing important events down, it is creating a piece of history that is able to be passed down generation after generation. This form of immortality keeps names alive and makes significant events able to be relived even after a mass amount of time has passed.
It is quite interesting that although throughout the epic Gilgamesh ultimately fails in his mission to achieve immortality, his legend continues to live on for thousands of years. Gilgamesh actually did achieve his goal of immortality, however not in the exact way he would have liked.
Additionally, humans battle with the quest for immortality by making their aging appearance seem much younger. The current generation has an obsession with looking young,; even when one is eighty years old. Humans cannot seem to part with their glowing youth, and tend to apply cosmetics or spend thousands of dollars on plastic surgery to look the best that money can buy. This form of immortality is superficial and interferes with the natural aging process. Since humanity cannot control their immortality, they tend to grab onto small insignificant pieces of human life that they ultimately can control, such as appearance.
I think that although people do deal with the concept of death, it is not a topic that can fully be understood until it occurs close by. People choose to interpret life as a gift, and something that is worth living because not everyone is as fortunate in the power of free living. I think it is also important to note that humans also seem to appreciate life more when a tragedy strikes, and when there is only a thread stringing together life and death. Situations such as car accidents, disease, and natural disasters make us truly question the importance of life. It is in these frightful moments that I think humans understand the significance of one life. The true meaning is to accomplish as much as possible during our short lifespan. If the world stopped turning once death was discovered, there would be no hope for humanity. There would be no one working towards any goal and nothing would get accomplished. I think people deal with death by taking every moment in their lives and making it count; maybe through volunteering or careers or children, or maybe not. Each situation and person is different, and what living is to them may not be what living is to someone else.
     Humans across the world also use religion to desribe an afterlife that leads the deceased through eternal life. This can be seen in christanity in the form of heaven or hell, depending on ohw one acted on earth. Although no one knows for sure whether this spiritual afterlife trult exists, it can be enough motivation to jumpstart people into making their lives count so that they do not end up dealing with Satan's wrath for all of eternity.

The Hero

The titles listed in the blog above are from different time periods, howver they share many similar qualities. One in particular is the protagonist that is present in each storyline. I think that in addition to being called a protagonist, the character can also be refereed to as a hero. For example, in The Sorcerer’s Stone, (a Harry Potter novel) Harry Potter who is seen as the protagonist, can also be seem as the hero. Harry has a special power accidentally given to him at birth and therefore has a responsibility to take control of the wizarding world to ensure that Voldemort does not return. By placing this responsibility on Harry, J,K Rowling makes him the hero. In every book Harry is able to “save the day” in the end, even if it did not go exactly as planned. Harry can also be portrayed a hero when his guilt overwhelms him. Harry feels guilt especially in the later books as his friends die and he cannot save them. I think this shows a true sense of moral responsibility that Harry feels he must fulfill. When the name hero is mentioned I always think of someone who tries to save the day, and also have an extremely positive moral compass. As I reflect on my own true meaning of a “hero” I believe that Harry Potter is a hero because he has a strong moral sense and understands his role in the wizarding world, even if Harry despises the task most times.

I define a heroic act as one that is selfless and has a sense of self sacrifice. A hero will extend their realm of comfort and go beyond their breaking point. A hero is someone who does things for the greater of society and not necessarily for their immediate individualistic goal. When I think of a heroic deed I think of Huck Finn. Although conflicted and influenced by society. Huck Finn still decided to travel with Jim down the Mississippi River. Huckleberry Finn is a hero because he put aside his conflicting ideas and decided to help a man in need. Instead of focusing on the individual detriment of not turning in a runaway slave, Huck Finn knows that Jim is in need and helps him. This is especially heroic because he is a young boy, and societies morals were ingrained into him for many years. Being able to stand up to society and to follow his sense of moral responsibility is truly heroic.

I think that women can be heroines and often are portrayed as such thing in modern literature. Heroines are much less prevalent in the earlier periods of time because society was completely different. The role of women in literature has changed for the better since the early ages. Primarily in this time male dominance was asserted and women took on a secondary role. In the past decade or so, there has been a new surge in feminism, and stories depicting women as the main heroine. I do not think that there is any reason that heroism should be based on the gender of an individual; it is silly to explicitly say that males are more likely to be a heroic figure than women based on may of the books chosen from the blog prompt. Although a majority of books we read in school are geared towards male heroism I do not believe that there is a specific reason for women’s absence in heroism.

When I think of heroism I do immediately think of a code of ethics of some sort. I think a hero should conduct himself in a particular fashion because he is seen as an authority and is held on such a high pedestal. For example, I think that Harry Potter is held to a moral code that he does not stray from. Although people around him may criticize the way his plan of action is put forth, Harry has an obligation to society to uphold a sense of morality. I think that this topic of upholding internal as well as external morality also relates to the theme of temptation. This theme comes into play when morals are threatened and the hero’s own beliefs are questioned.

I think that society needs heroic figures because it gives people something to believe in. Heroes are held above the average person most times, and reaching the heroic level is something many humans strive for. With heroes being people who uphold morals, it gives people a sense that there is good in the world. Without heroism, their would be no greater people and also no way to distinguish between humans. Heroes represent the greater good in the world, and often are seen on a godlike platform instead of associating with common people. Without classification of different people there would be no higher place for humans to reach.
A land that needs a hero is one that does not have a strong moral code, and also probably needs “saving.” To be more specific, the wizarding world in the Harry Potter books needed Harry because an evil force was trying to take over the Ministry of Magic, and chaos was breaking out all over the place. If this was not occurring, there wouldn’t necessarily be a need for Harry to accept his heroic role, and save all of society. This society couldn’t be happy because they lived in fear, not knowing when or where Voldemort would strike next. With this sense of fear and uncertainty, automatically came the call to action of Harry Potter. This particular society needed a solution so they found one; starting in the hands of a thirteen year old boy.